I know everyone is eagerly waiting to hear more about the Sharpstown scandal, which I began explaining in my last post.  But don’t worry, it’s in the pipeline. As I close down 2023, however, I’ll share something I’ve been thinking about since running across a blast-from-the-past letter. 

Back in October 2006, I wrote to my friend, Susie Huber, tongue firmly planted in cheek (if that can happen on the written page).   Susie and I met in 1982 when we were both working at the Comptroller’s office and we remained good friends for almost 40 years until she succumbed to pancreatic cancer in 2020. She was one of the funniest people I’ve ever known.

This letter brought back a lot of good memories.

Dear Susie,

As you’ll recall, back in our Bullockian days of demanding, but damn effective government service, those of us in the Research Division would find creative ways to add some levity to our work days.  

Remember “Dan Casey Day?” We all showed up for work that day in khakis, blue button-down shirts, and yellow ties to mock, I mean, honor, our friend Dan by donning his “uniform” en masse.  That was a hoot!  What about that time when someone in the division (who must remain nameless) wrote a fake Comptroller press release that was momentarily confused for the real thing? It was very funny for a short while.

And it was during those days, while you were the Research Division’s librarian, that our boss and consummate wit, Tony Proffitt, started calling you “Marian.”  Strangely enough, the Marian sobriquet stuck and, even today, some people think it’s your REAL name!  

Then, there was some, no doubt, hysterically funny joke we were going to play that involved superimposing Bob Farley’s head on a picture of a tuxedo-clad guy escorting a gal in a formal ballgown.  For this, you brought your high school yearbook that had a picture we would use with our “high tech” Xerox machine.  (Photoshop was a way off.) It was this yearbook that prompted your telling me about your Peaking Principle.

As anyone who has seen it will agree, the New Braunfels High School yearbook of that year should have been subtitled, “Susie Does High School.”   There you were on virtually EVERY page.  You were like Barbie!   As Homecoming Queen, you were Royal Barbie.  You were Sporty Barbie, appearing as head cheerleader.  As football team sweetheart, you were Sugar-and-Spice Barbie.  And to top it all off, there was Beauty Queen Barbie, wearing a ribbon that proclaimed you “Miss Flame 1967?!”  (This was a special honor bestowed during the town’s Fire Prevention Week.)  I was so impressed!  I just wish color photographs had been invented back then. . . I bet your dress was a stunning red!

Marveling over all this, I shared with you how my high school career was rather pedestrian in comparison.  I was just a nice-enough gal, while you were obviously the most sought-after girl within a 100-mile radius. 

Then you told me that all this pageantry and popularity before the age of 19 was good stuff, but it had one big downside.  As you divulged, “I peaked too soon, and the problem with peaking so early is that everything that comes afterward in life is somewhat anti-climatic. It’s all downhill after all that.”   

“But,” as you so helpfully told me, “since you haven’t peaked yet, you have a lot to look forward to in life.” 

I was thankful for that encouragement. Ever since, Susie, I wake up wondering if this is the day when I’ll begin to peak.

After something particularly great occurs, I’ll often stop and ask:   “Am I peaking yet?”  Invariably, I say, “Nahhh, not yet. . .”  In fact, I  thought it might have happened last weekend at my 35th high school reunion, attending in good health and wearing Banana Republic SIZE 8 jeans!!! I didn’t even wear size 8 in high school!  But the next day, as I nursed my hangover, I decided I wouldn’t feel that bad if I were at a pinnacle period.

So, I just want you to know that I’m still wondering when it might happen…

*    *    * 

I had forgotten about this attempt at friendly jocularity until I ran across it in the first days of this month. I was already in a reflective mood as most of us are this time of year.  So, after I reread the letter with a few chuckles and fond memories, I began to take stock of the past few years from a new perspective, a peaking perspective.

Things have been pretty good during the last few years. For a septuagenarian, I have relatively good health.  I still get around. After 40 years of work with the State of Texas, I retired, having worked in several agencies where I maintained a positive reputation and acquired a good bunch of friends along the way.  I have two sons  and two grandsons that I get to see often, and a paid-for house in Austin, the city where I grew up and in which I still enjoy living, despite the traffic and burgeoning population.

All of that would tally up to a pretty good 70 years, but, wait, there’s more!  I have a handsome man in my life whose love and companionship are beyond anything I could have ever imagined.  A fellow lawyer and professional poet, Robin Cravey respects, admires, romances, and tells me on a regular basis how great I am.  Very regularly.

I wish I could tell Susie how he makes me laugh, writes beautiful poems about me and listens to my poems about him without wincing.  Together, we enjoy travel, nature hikes and bike rides on our e-bikes. We spend many blissful evenings cooking together, talking and drinking wine with Frank Sinatra, Willie, or Elvis singing in the background.  He listens to me attentively, which is wonderful, and remembers what I tell him, which is even more wonderful. 

Could I possibly be peaking?  

Ironically, Robin and I have had a literal peak experience — climbing to the top of Enchanted Rock, which Robin had done many times, but I’d never thought I could do, despite its appearance on my bucket list. In truth, it was more on my regrets list, i.e., things I wish I had done. Robin, however, thought I could still do it and that we should try (after he helped me train on some hilly terrain).  

With my confidence bolstered, we made reservations for a day that ended up being cold and very windy, and to my surprise, I made it!!  I was delighted that my legs were strong enough, with help and tugs from Robin at some tricky parts, to make it to the top.  I was equally pleased that I managed not to break an ankle on the way down (we septuagenarians think like this). 

I was so excited about the experience, I couldn’t stop talking about it, even after the second celebratory martini in a Fredericksburg bar!  Robin had taken pictures during the climb and later ordered a big canvas to hang on my wall, depicting my moment at the top — just so I would remember what victory felt like. 

Now, as I look at that picture and think of Susie’s (semi-serious) peaking principle, I realize that my standing up there in my “Rocky” pose is more than a picture of a successful rock climber — it is a metaphor for my life.  It is also a signal to Susie proclaiming,

I AM PEAKING, SUSIE, DAMMIT, I AM PEAKING!!

As I begin this new year, I toast Susie/Marian and all the good friends I’ve been lucky enough to have in my life and the loving man who wants to help me continue peaking, one dream and desire at a time.  As we continue along life’s journey, I will be smelling whatever roses I find, living in the moments I have left, and savoring each and every one.  I am a lucky woman.

Happy New Year, everyone, and hail to librarians everywhere!!